UEFA Champions League - Top 5 Worst Fistpumps of the Week

Bizarre coincidence that the Champions League Sweet 16 harkens the revival of Fistpumps.com?

Hmmm...perhaps a little too much of a coincidence...or perhaps too bizarre...hmmmm....

Hmmmm...

Fistpumps.com is introducing a new segment this week which will both glorify the shear magnificence of a grandiose fistpump and lambast the selfishness of a poor non-fistpumping celebration in a little piece we like to call...This Week's Top 5 Best/Worst Fistpumps from the Champions League!...or something to that extent...

Anyway, we begin this week with the Top 5 Worst Champions League Fistpumps (aka Non-Fistpumps)...

5. Robin Van Persie - Arsenal

Although Van Persie's lackluster celebration appears unoriginal and thoughtless, I can't fault him to the fullest extent. Simply put, in these trying economic times, it is only necessary for Van Persie to help Arsenal maintain their Emirates sponsorship by going with this airplane-like form of excitement...even if it is a complete fistpumping dud...


4. Juninho - Lyon

I guess we shouldn't be too surprised that in France it is customary for players to blow kisses to their adoring sissy fans instead of fistpumping...

3. Thierry Henry - Barcelona

Between Juninho and Henry, this match saw, by far, the worst fistpumping display (Henry is French...coincidence?). Henry is a repeat fistpump offender, so it should come to no surprise that he is once again devoid of fistpumping ability...

If you take a closer look, notice that Henry's dreary display of exultation leaves the baffled Lyon defender simply wondering..."Who does he think he is? Tatanka?"...

2. Giorgias Karagounis - Panathinaikos

We've harkened many times on the fact that Mediterraneans are arguably the most prolific pumpers. Many believe this dates back to Greek mythology's claim to have garnered the first ever fistpump (more on this tomorrow). However, my man Giorgias leaves us all befuddled with this bizarre non-fistpumping celebration...

Do not be surprised if Mr. Karagouris is mysteriously struck by lightning this week...while eating a gyro...with John Stamos.

1. Lissandro Lopez and Lucho Gonzalez - FC Porto

Lopez notched two goals in Porto's draw with Madrid on Tuesday. His first goal produced one of the most obscure celebrations you will ever see on the pitch...

This kind of malfeasance should not be ignored, and will most certainly not be condoned by Fistpumps.com.

Check back tomorrow with our list of the Best Champions League Fistpumps of the Week!